My dog is like a child & reasons why I can use that comparison

I've heard moms of human babies say things like, dogs are not the same as babies, there is no comparison, babies are so much harder, dogs are so easy to take care of, just put the dog outside, and so on, and so forth. Well, I am here to say that I completely disagree with you, moms of human babies. I am a dog mom. And it's a real thing. I am not his owner or his keeper...I am his mom. When I call my dog's daycare I tell them, Hi, this is Louis' mom and I'd like to make a reservation for him. I am not here to argue that dogs are more of a responsibility or harder to take care of than babies. I am not a human baby mom, but I am well aware that babies are hard to take care of (that's probably why I don't have human kids). It's an exhausting job, I understand that. I am one of four children and to this day I don't know how my mom did it. I've seen 16 & Pregnant, OK? Thanks, MTV. I get it. 

I am here to share my point of view to the human baby moms who say there is no comparison between taking care of a baby and a dog... because there most definitely is (in my opinion - don't get all judge-y on me - hashtag eye roll). 

Let's start off with puppies. Brand new baby puppies. These adorable angel babies need care, nurturing, love, compassion, training, and all of the other stuff in between. They cannot function without their human mother. They need to be taught, they need to learn, they need discipline. The same goes for a baby. Babies need the same care, nurturing, love, and compassion that my puppy needs. Similarity number one, of many...Check. 

Again, let me stress this so human moms don't hate me, I am not arguing that dogs are harder to take care of then children, I repeat. I am doing no such thing. 

Babies cry. All the time. Dogs also cry (or whine) when they need something and want attention. You can't ignore either one. Dogs need attention just like babies do. 

Dogs poop. Usually, they go outside to do their business, so yes, that is way easier on dog moms than human moms. Babies poop in diapers, a lot, and it can be very messy, I get it. But, there will be those occasions where my dog will have a #1 or #2 accident in the house (he's sick, ate something weird, etc., etc.). and will do his business right there on the floor. He just won't be able to help it. Better yet, he goes right on the carpet. That's always a fun one to clean up. 

Speaking of cleaning up bodily fluids...Babies not only poop but they also throw up, a lot. A lot more than a dog does. However, if you have a sick dog, a large sick dog, you'll be surprised at how much vomit they are able to produce. 

For example, my dog son Louis (almost 2 years old, or in human mom terms, 24 months) was recently really sick. He was throwing up white foam for a solid 24-hours. And I was panicking. He couldn't eat, he had zero energy, it was pitiful. We still crate him during the day, so I had to work from home for two days (unexpectedly, obviously) in order to take care of him. You can't leave a vomiting dog alone in a crate all day, or even outside in the yard for that matter. Would you leave your baby outside or alone in their crib if they were constantly vomiting? No. That's just mean. Anyway, he was throwing up so often that I couldn't clean it up fast enough, so I had piles of dog vomit all over my house.  I had to cover each spot with a paper towel so I wouldn't step on it before I was able to clean it up. Sound familiar, human moms? Vomit? Everywhere? Yeah, it was unpleasant. 

Having a dogs is also similar to having a baby because they cannot tell you what's wrong. They can't tell you what hurts. They can't tell you that they don't feel well. Babies will at least grow up to have a voice. My dog will never be able to talk to me. Side Note: I want to teach him to text, but that's a whole other thing. 

My recent visit to the vet ended with a $600.00 bill. Yeah, that's not a typo. Again, I am not a human mom so I do not know how much it costs each time you take your child to see the pediatrician, but human moms...when was the last time your child had a non life-threatening cold/flu/ear infection/stomach virus/etc. and you spent $600.00 out of pocket at the doctor's office? That $600.00 got me two vet visits, an X-ray, blood work, and a shot to help him stop vomiting. And the best part is, they had no answer as to why he wasn't feeling well. His GI Tract was slightly inflamed, but that's all they could tell me. Thankfully, after a very sleepless week for me, (I cried a lot to Luke (who was out of town) saying, and I quote, "I don't want him to die. What if he dies?") he was better and back to his energetic-self, but $600.00 and not even a legitimate diagnosis? Yeah. 

More comparisons that come to mind...

1. Food :: My dog is fed at least three times a day. I buy him the expensive $50+ (for one 24 pound bag of food) Grain-Free Salmon dry dog food. He has a grain allergy (he gets very itchy) so I have to buy him special food...Babies also eat several times a day. 
2. Bathing :: My dog needs a bath on a regular basis...So do children. That includes brushing teeth, cleaning ears, trimming nails, etc. 
3. Toys :: I buy my dog a lot of toys and spend a lot of money on them. He's a dog so he rips them up after a few days or weeks if I buy cheap ones, which means I tend to buy him the expensive toys (Kong) so they can hopefully last for a while. I also buy him Rawhide bones (NOT NYLABONE) and he can eat one of those in a matter of hours. A bag of them does not last long at our house. Side Note: If you buy your dogs Nylabone, stop it. Stop it now. Dogs can obviously choke on basically anything if you don't watch them carefully...hm, sounds like another comparison to a baby...but Nylabone is bad. If you keep buying them for your dog I will punch you...Babies also play with toys. A lot of toys. But when women are pregnant, people throw them baby showers (which I think is great) and friends and family buy them toys, clothes, diapers, etc. Again, more expensive than a dog, but where are the dog mom baby showers at?! I am only half kidding about that...
4. Daycare :: My dog goes to daycare. It's not as expensive as human baby daycare, but he goes and I have to pay for it...A lot of babies also go to daycare, unless families are fortunate enough to have a stay-at-home mom. My mom was a stay-at-home mom and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. 

This is oh-so accurate.

Other things I happily do for my dog: I give him fresh water several times a day (I'll even give him filtered water), I wash his blankets that we put in his "house" (crate) on a regular basis, I have to vacuum up his hair all the time, I let him in and out and in and out and in and out of the house constantly to play/poop/pee/eat grass/flirt with the neighbor dog, Bella/play with the neighbor kid, Adrian/play in the snow/dig up the plants/run around in circles like a spaz/bark at the construction workers/bark at the neighbor dogs/bark at people walking on the sidewalk/bark when the wind blows, I play fetch with him, I play tug of war with him, I clean the stuffing up off of the floor when he rips it out of his toys, I have to mop the kitchen floor because he gets muddy paw prints everywhere, the list is endless. 

I worry about my dog just like I would worry about a child...Is he OK? Is he happy? What if he's hungry? Did I feed him enough today? Did I feed him too much today? Is he lonely? Is he sad? Does he hate his "house"? Is he mad/sad when I leave for work every day? Why does he seem sluggish? Could he be sick? Did he eat something he shouldn't have? Maybe he is tired? Did he get hurt? Does he have fleas? What if he gets bit by a tick? Am I paying enough attention to him?  Why is he itching so much? Does he have an allergy? Did I schedule his vet visit? Is he up-to-date on his vaccines? Is he too hot? Is he thirsty?...I could go on, and on, and on. 

Basically, I love my dog more than I thought I could ever love something with four legs. I love him more than I even like most people. I hug him, kiss him, give him belly rubs, and leg massages (yeah, you read that right) on a daily basis. He needs me and cannot get through his day without me. He relies on me and trusts me 100% of the time. 

Moral of the story...Love your dog like you'd love your child, and love your child like you'd love your dog. 

And adopt (dogs or children), don't shop!